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lyrics

My friend’s mom, she’s got a big rubber dick
It’s got four different speeds and they all do the trick
It’s got a gasoline engine and at the end it spits
She gave it a name, she called it Rick

She keeps it in a box underneath her bed
It’s a male substitute with a prosthetic head
Half a pound of plastic that’s a bundle of fun
It keeps going, going, going ‘till the batteries are done

Your aunt, your mom
Everyone’s got one on
Thick or thin, big and small
Come on down and try them all
Your sister, your cousin
They keep them by the dozen
Red, blue, black and green
No matter what color they’re all pretty mean
Found it snooping in her room one day
Took a closer look and to my dismay
She wrote it with a sharpie on the side of the dick
She gave it a name, she called it Rick

I powered it up for curiosity’s sake
I dropped it on the floor and it began to vibrate
It bumped and it jumped and we chased it around
A supercharged dick shook the whole house down

Your aunt, your mom
Everyone’s got one on
Thick or thin, big and small
Come on down and try them all
Your sister, your cousin
They keep them by the dozen
Red, blue, black and green
No matter what color they’re all pretty mean

credits

from Rick, released April 15, 2002

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Criminally Insane Americans Cortez, Colorado

CIA was a band from 1999-2001, playing simple crossover punk/thrash with humorous lyrics. Based in Cortez, CO

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