1. |
Charles Buford March
01:49
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Charles Buford had a simple plan
He took a shit in Marco’s van
He walks by SWOS with dirty knees
Laughing at the cigarette casualties
I saw him in the park the other day
Sleeping on a bench and drinking hair spray
Looking for a handout Charles starts to beg
I gave him a dollar and he fucked my leg
March
Charles Buford March
Charles Buford March
Charles Buford March
Charles Buford
The girls say he’s cute wanna give him a squeeze
Don’t touch his head or he’ll give you fleas
Charles keeps a lookout to piss in the grass
But authority figures kick him in the ass
Shittin’ on the sidewalk marchin’ down the street
Pukin’ on the doorstep, gets his ass beat
Got twenty bitches pregnant in an alley shed
Meth lab exploded and now he’s dead
March
Charles Buford March
Charles Buford March
Charles Buford March
Charles Buford
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2. |
The Return of Larry
03:00
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A beer in each hand and one bad tooth
He’ll kick your ass and it’s the fuckin’ truth
Partying hard every single night
Waking up next to an empty case of Bud Light
When his red Dodge rolls into town
You know there’s gonna be some schwag around
He tells a lot of stories and won’t pass the joint
Slaps a mexican until he gets the point
He’s always got some drugs
He’s always ready to brawl
He gets wasted every night
He’s never going down without a fight
He’s a hip hop cowboy and a skater too
Goes four wheeling in the invincible shoe
Takes a shotgun blast directly to the jaw
Boozes it up and comes back for more
A rodeo wigger, drinks until he hurls
Always picking up on the horse faced girls
Smokes a cigarette and stares death in the eye
But he keeps coming back, he’ll never die
He’s always got some drugs
He’s always ready to brawl
He gets wasted every night
He’s never going down without a fight
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3. |
Rick
02:12
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My friend’s mom, she’s got a big rubber dick
It’s got four different speeds and they all do the trick
It’s got a gasoline engine and at the end it spits
She gave it a name, she called it Rick
She keeps it in a box underneath her bed
It’s a male substitute with a prosthetic head
Half a pound of plastic that’s a bundle of fun
It keeps going, going, going ‘till the batteries are done
Your aunt, your mom
Everyone’s got one on
Thick or thin, big and small
Come on down and try them all
Your sister, your cousin
They keep them by the dozen
Red, blue, black and green
No matter what color they’re all pretty mean
Found it snooping in her room one day
Took a closer look and to my dismay
She wrote it with a sharpie on the side of the dick
She gave it a name, she called it Rick
I powered it up for curiosity’s sake
I dropped it on the floor and it began to vibrate
It bumped and it jumped and we chased it around
A supercharged dick shook the whole house down
Your aunt, your mom
Everyone’s got one on
Thick or thin, big and small
Come on down and try them all
Your sister, your cousin
They keep them by the dozen
Red, blue, black and green
No matter what color they’re all pretty mean
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4. |
Rape Chain
01:56
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It’s two in the morning I’m awake in my bed
And I cannot sleep cuz there’s static in my head
The alarm’s going off and Jeff’s still passed out on the floor
Men in yellow suits are trying to kick down my door, so I...
Put on the rape chain
Put on the rape chain
Put on the rape chain
Put on the rape chain
It’s saturday night and no one’s left here but me
Frat boys are giving ugly girls GHB
Headed toward my room is a nasty looking whore
So I stepped back inside and I slammed the fucking door and I…
Put on the rape chain
Put on the rape chain
Put on the rape chain
Put on the rape chain
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5. |
The Slam Pigs
04:01
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She’s got some big tits but I don’t need a disease
She just wants some action, not flowers or poetry
With a little motivation she gets ready to please
Just get her alone, then she’s going down for free
But I dunno
I don’t think that I should
What the hell
I got nothing better to do
The Slam Pigs
Like to get drunk
They get stupid
And won’t shut the fuck up
The Slam Pigs
Like to get fucked
They get wasted
Then they get slammed
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Criminally Insane Americans Cortez, Colorado
CIA was a band from 1999-2001, playing simple crossover punk/thrash with humorous lyrics. Based in Cortez, CO
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